It's A Struggle

The past couple of days has left me with no work, I shoveled myself right out of a job. I'm looking at trying to get a job in the customer service area and have started my search today. I've earned enough to survive for a week or two of waiting for a check from a new job. The weather has been good to me and looks to not be to bad for the next couple of weeks. Man, God sure has looked out for me in the weather conditions.

Today has been a tough day for me, the old depression seems to be hovering around me and it has been a struggle just to hold the head up, but I know I have the comfort and strength of God and that thought in it's self has pushed me on.

I'll post my last readings of The Purpose Driven Life tonight after I get back from more job searching.

As I walk through this day I'll be thinking of the band Building 429's song "Fearless" as I struggle to hold my head up and feel good about life in general. The video is lead out by a verse from Psalm 112:8 "They are confident and fearless and can face their foes triumphantly" which will also be in my mind.

A Crisp Fresh Start

Waking up with a dusting of light powdery snow on the sleeping bag and tarp and the awe inspiring alpenglow gave me the hint that God was smiling down upon me. The cold (10 degrees) squeaky walk from camp helped me to focus on what a awesome world God created for us to enjoy.

I just wanted to thank everyone who has been praying for my welfare and continued walk with Jesus. Through these prayers and continued discipline of doing God's will, my life has been jammed full of happy moments. This is just the beginning of a wonderful journey with God, which has actually been less stressful even though being homeless.

My question for today to others is; "How many conversations have you had with God today?"

I have a day filled with responsibility to make my living and work conditions more comfortable. So, I'm off on a thrift shopping adventure and cost estimate for the New Path sandwich board.

I needed a song to keep in my head during my shuffle around the city so I stopped here at the UofU library to find one. It will be nice when I'm able to have one of those MP3 players so I can carry this music with me along with some of the great christian podcasts available. (People tend to give me weird looks when I'm trying to sing, whistle or hum my songs and I can't say if I blame them, music talent is not one of God's blessings for me.) Audio Adrenaline's, "Get Down" gives me that up beat and moving lyrics that will put my head and mind with Him during the day, even during the trying times of having to deal with impatient holiday shoppers. Oh yea, check it out, in the lyrics they state; "To live your life, you've got to loose it, and all of the loosers get a crown".

Where else can you surrender and actually come out as the winner?



Have a great day!!

A Few Moments of Panhandling

With the upcoming storm here in Salt Lake City, I was in need of some winter gear so that I would be able to work outside and to be somewhat comfortable staying outside. After the 12:30 message at K2 The Church, I went to the shopping plaza near Sugar House Park, where I put together a sign and stood near an entrance to the parking lot. On the sign it stated:

Homeless
Any Help
Appreciated
Need
Socks
Winter Boots
Sleeping Bag
Thank You

This was a real experience for me and an eye-opener. Before I even started to hold the sign I prayed that I would receive the items that I needed and during my stand I thought to myself, "If God wants me to have it, then it will happen". Well, I was blessed! After 4 hours, I received enough to buy a pair of good thermal winter boots and thermal socks. I didn't get the sleeping bag, but felt God had a reason for this. One gentleman came by with a box full of thermal underwear and enough socks for a couple of weeks, along with other warm clothing. After this person left me with the box, I had to stop and take a long breath and wipe the water from my eyes, I just couldn't believe what was happening.

The day wasn't full of blessings, it also had it's moments of disgusted looks, people saying; "Yea, right, he isn't homeless", along with other quotes I'll refrain from listing here.

I watched as those with the big expensive objects drove by with disgusted looks on their face and pretend that I wasn't even there. Some people would smile and that was great to me, because, yes they recognized me which made me feel like I was human.

To each person (except one, when I lost the paper) that gave, I handed a paper thanking them and inviting them to this blog, if you are one of those who received this I say, "Thank you very much for giving, trusting and believing. I invite each one of you into my life on this journey I've started, and you all will be in my prayers tonight".

Will I ever hold a sign like this again? I truly believe that this is the one and only time that I will ever need to do this. And I pray that I'll never be in this situation again where as last resort it is needed.

Today was also Day 8 in my reading of "The Purpose Driven Life". This chapter, "Planned For God's Pleasure", really fit me to a tee today, and was one that I'll always remember.

Bringing pleasure to God is called "Worship", and it doesn't just pertain to singing and music. Worship is anything that you do to please and give glory to God. This could be helping at your church's service, working at your daily job, sharing a smile with a homeless person, or helping your neighbor. Anything that you do to bring pleasure to God is an act of worship.

Well today I felt I brought pleasure to God by trusting in Him to deliver the items I needed for work and staying warm. I didn't look back at those who gave me those unpleasing gestures or stares with the same or worse gesture or stare. I didn't come out with any words of disregard to those who openly suggested where to go. Today, so far I feel I've pleasured God by being truthful, open, warm and, well, just what He expected me to be.

My Music of The Day

A real quick quote from "The Purpose Driven Life" reading today; pg.65

"God loves all kinds of music because he invented it all-fast and slow, loud and soft, old and new. You probably don't like it all, but God does! If it is offered to God in spirit and truth, it is an act of worship."

This song from Waking Ashland goes right along with where my thinking has been for the last two weeks. "All Hands On Deck" will remain close to me for along time to come.

Buy Waking Ashland Music

Vision Is On Its Way

I received great news today that I'll be receiving new eyeglasses from the Salt Lake City Lions Club. I've set up an appointment for an exam later today and God willing I may have my vision back. It will be so great to be able to focus on my surroundings and enjoy one of God's greatest creation, the world which we live in.

Day four of The Purpose Driven Life is "Made to Last Forever" and I'm just starting to read it. When I finish I'll come back and discuss my experience with this chapter.

Today I've chosen a very popular song with all christians and it remains on the top of Billboard's christian music charts. This video is of Chris Tomlin singing"Made to Worship", is from the Passion 2006 concert, and just goes to show why Time magazine printed an article "Hip Hymns Are Him", everyone loves to sing his songs. I'm sure he'll be at the top of the christian pop charts for a long time.

Website Chris Tomlin

Buy Chris Tomlin Music

More Christian Rock Videos

What Drives Your Life?

The 3 day in The Purpose Driven Life is asking me what my life is currently driven by. When I stop and view where I'm at and how I got here, I think "Man, you've been wandering around just trying to please and impress everyone around you". My life has always been about gaining approval from everyone, even those who I didn't know. As it says in Matthew 6:24 - "No one can serve two masters".

Who am I fooling when I thought I could please everyone? It is God that I need to please because He is the one that will be judging me. This chapter was asking me what I've known for sometime now, but never knew or had the strength to change it.

I'm looking forward to getting on with the book but I'll do as it asks and take it one day and chapter at a time. Hey, kinda like AA. I've already started to narrow down the things in my life that are actually pushing me to the insane edge and have started to focus on this new journey with God.

I've been working on learning website publishing and have taken it to include a site with christian rock videos called what else "God Rock Videos". Yea, I like rock and it's a great way for me to focus and get through my day. Hope you get a chance to visit it.

Tomorrow I think there is a dinner at the Utah Jazz's basketball venue the formally known as the Delta Center, which has changed to the EnergySolutions Arena that I'll try to visit. Throughout the next couple of days the thanksgiving feasts for the needy are bountiful.

Sweep It Under The Rug

Well today I attended K2 The Church 12:30 service with the main intention to speak with Andy Marshall, the director of spiritual growth. Today's message "Sweep It Under The Rug" was the 3rd in the 4 part series "Wrecking Your Relationships In 4 Easy Steps". I had already listened to the first part yesterday, and I'll be listening to the 2nd part tonight, however I wasn't prepared for what Andy spoke about today. It really hit hard and tied right into what I had planned to talk to a him about.

TRUTH!!!

Yea, being truthful with each other, spouses, friends, or in my case, God and myself. At the end of the service I waited while Andy talked with a few members, and as I watched it gave me a chance to reflect on what I was about to do. Last night I had decided that it was time to set up a time to set down with a pastor (I had Andy in mind.) and start working on doing what God has intended me to do. Well after 2+ years of having said I was going to do it, I actually took the first step today and told Andy that I was ready to go to work, and that I needed to get truthful with God and myself. YES!!! I said it. I didn't back out while waiting to talk with Andy, and say to myself, "Oh well, I'll speak to him next week, or next time." Who knows there may never be a next time.

I have so many things that I have swept under the rug during my 47 years on this globe. So I hope Andy will have a few hours (days, months, years???) to set down and discuss what I need to do and how I can go about doing it. I also need to repent for the many things I've done in the past (This would be a huge load off of my back.). I'll be setting up an time to meet with Andy and only can pray that it will be soon.

Ah yea, I got a NIV bible today, so now I can put it to use with A Purpose Driven Life and just for reading when I once read autobiographies of successful business people. Hey why not be studying how to become a successful servant of God, right?

Okay, my music files are not loading (sorry) and I'll be looking for a new FREE file sharing site that has more than 30mb of storage. During this time try CNET for free christian music MP3 downloads.

I'm going to work on setting up a new website on a free server today. The site will be for DSL rate quotes and I hope to have it up by late tonight. So off I go.

A Purpose in 40 Days?

I found a book that friends had given to me last year, A Purpose Driven Life, written by Rick Warren. I have never put forth the effort to actually read and utilize this book in the past, but as of today and with God's help, I will commit the next 40 days of my life to discovering God's purpose for my life. Each day I will share this journey here.

Today's the start and the first sentence is probably the most important one in life, "It's not about you." Yes, we are here for Him and it isn't all about Scott. This is a thought that I will ponder on today. It has always been, "What will I get out of this?" Changing my ways to put God's way first is a whole different outlook and I'm sure it will take some time, but hey doing it my way sure didn't work.

I hope to be adding some cartoons here from an artist Jeff Larson and The Back Pew. Jeff does some great work so check the site out.

My song of the day is from Steele Croswhite and The Rock Church Band. They are from here in Salt Lake City and you can hear them at The Rock Church on some nights. The song Completely is very fitting for me today. If you visit The Rock Church or buy a CD, let them know that homeless Scott sent ya.

The Sadness of Many

Tonight I read blogs and news articles about homelessness and found the thoughts of many throughout our world and nation are of corrupt and greed. Take the money that will be made on the PS3s, I'm sure these profiteers won't be handing out checks to homeless organizations. Those in Dallas who believe the CityWalk@Akard program will bring down the value of their properties and lifestyle. Are there not those with money who also can bring value and destruction down on human life?

Here enters my song for the day from a band in Crowley, LA, The Park Avenue Band is singing one of the greatest hymns I Cry Holy. This brings a chill to me as He reaches out and touches me tonight. Yes, I guess you can say the tears are rolling tonight. Is it happiness or sadness? Well one person knows and He is there for me tonight. Oh yea, I Cry Holy!

All In A Day With Him

Ahhhh, what a refreshing day! A day of accomplishments and some peace of mind. A new social security card on the way, a recommendation for new eyeglasses from the local Lions Club, a job interview tomorrow, and a relaxed mind. Yes. Yes! YESSS!! All of this is happening because I've put it in His hands not mine.

"The Lord Thunders" is what Steele Croswhite sings in his song Thunders. I'm not sure what verse it comes from but I beleive its in Psalms somewhere. This song is awesome and pumps me up!

Hey Thomas, it may not be Garth but it sure gets me going.

I'll be on a mission tomorrow to find a NIV bible, so I may start to meditate on it throughout the day and night as it states in Joshua 1:8. The job interview is in the afternoon and even if I don't get it atleast its a step in the right direction.

My only fear is fear itself and failure to accomplish what the Lord has in store for me. I pray that these feelings that I'm experiencing don't ever go away, its great to be able to smile, walk and talk with others without believing I'm such a failure.

I've been a Detroit Tiger fan since I can remember, and never gave up on them even 3 years ago when they lost 119 games, this is the same faith that God has in me. He never gave up on me, and has always been supportive of me even when I was the lowest of the low. Now its time for me to put the faith back into Him and do as he wishes. Getting my life back together is not going to happen overnight, but as Will Smith stated in Readers Digest this month: "I do not have to build a perfect wall today. I just have to lay a perfect brick. Just lay one brick, dude."

Walking To A Different Beat

The freshness of being clean, YES! Now to work on cleaning up the rest of this worn and torn soul. I had one of the best nights of rest last night even with the ice on my sleeping bag, sure hope it drys out today. I'm working on trying to get a pair of glasses so I may see my surroundings without the blur. I was recommended to the Lions Club and will be contacting them today concerning a new pair of specs.

I have been listening to a local christian rock band today "The Rock Church Band" and its been great, the song Walk On Water will be stuck in my head today while I walk through this day of life.

Until later on, may you have a Great Day!